Coon Chronicles- Part 3

I was in high school and at Sears looking for a certain item. I can’t, for the life of me, remember WHAT item I was looking for, but whatever it was…was out of stock.

I went to the courtesy counter to get a rain check or whatever Sears was calling them back in the late 80’s/early 90’s. I’m dating myself, I know. And yes, I did had big hair. shut. up.

So I’m in line, trying to get this rain check thingie and it’s finally my turn.
I go up to the counter, explain what I’d like, confirm that it’s out of stock and ask for a rain check.

Now, when you get a rain check, you sometimes need to fill it out with your personal information….ya know, date, item, etc. Well, we didn’t even get that far. We stopped at NAME.

Here’s kinda how it went….


Him: Last name?

Me: Coon

Him (he’s African American): EXCUSE ME???

Me (like nothing’s wrong, not knowing that my name was is a racial slur): COOOOON!

Him (severely pissed): WHAT?!?

Me (What is he, retarded?): C-O-O-N

Him (done with me): Who are you kidding???

Me (I can’t believe I have to pull out my drivers license): See??? My last name is COOOOOOON!


Many days passed before I learned what was really behind that conversation. It was certainly one of those exchanges that stuck with me. WOW.